Make me laugh

Im bored, tell me some of the funniest jokes/anecdotes you have ever heard.

Ok here goes:

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

OMFG!!! That is the absolute funniest thing I have ever heard!!!

hehe i posted a joke like that on that other jokes topic…i got quite a response :stuck_out_tongue:
okay here goes, its more of a riddle but i hear its hilarious!

There once was a man, he couldnt take his life anymore so he decided to jump off a cliff. He jumped, falling and falling he hit a tree branch sticking out from the side of the cliff. Where is the man now?

hehe :slight_smile:

here…have a good laugh…

lol those were hilarious…

shall i get more,my master?

nice, nice hey im almost not bored anymore, almost :smiley:

lol i got a good blonde joke…Why did the blonde wear a condom on her ears?

She was afraid of getting hearing aids…lol

there were 3 men,who worked on a construction yard.everyday day they would sit down for lunch together."i hate my boring lunch,supid good 4 nothing wife.if she makes me this tomorow 2,im gonna…killl myself"said 1 of the men.the other man said “me too” and so did the other. the next day they went to sit down for lunch.the first man saw his lunch and jumped off the building.the second and third man did the same.3 hours later the 3 wives were mourning. the first and second wife said “why didnt i give him a better lunch oh no!!!” then the first wife said to the 3rd “why didnt u change ur husbands lunch?” the third wife replied "its not my foult, he made his own lunch!!!

bush, abe linclon, jefferson and washington were all on a plane…

washington said he will make 1 person happy so he threw 1 single out the window…

linclon said he would make 10 people happy so he threw out 10 singles…

jefferson said he would make the whole world happy so he threw bush out the window!

buda tish!!!

thats not funny. excpecially the part about bush.

lol y2k funny :stuck_out_tongue:
sickmate 8)

lol source…that bush joke was hilarious…roflmfao!!!

Theres 3 guys standing outside the geuiness book of records building and one of em says, “i think i have the biggest hands in the world” so he goes in and 10 minutes later comes out and says, “your looking at the biggest hands in the world. The second guy says, " I think i have the biggest feet in the world”. So he walks in and 10 minutes later comes out and says, " your looking at the biggest feet in the world." So the third guys thinking and says, " well i dont got anything too big but i think i got the smallest penis in the world." So he goes in and 5 minutes later he comes out bawlling his eyes out and says, “who the hell is Chaosnoob”. No offense chaos u were the first person i could think of.

2 gay guys are in a shower and the door bell rings so one guys gets out and tells the other guy to not do anything while hes gone. So he answers the door and its some dude selling something. So he goes back in to the shower and theres *** everywhere in the shower. So the gay guy who got out says, " I thought i told you not to do anything." and the other gay guy says, “I didnt do anyhting i just farted.” No offense to any homosexual people on these forums.

This one is racist so please dont get mad at me. Why do black people always wear FUBU
Used to
again these are my 3 funnies no offense to anyone.

…pfft u loser. ur just jealous im a bigger noob than youll EVER BE!
lol jk…but i was the first one to pop into ur head for that sick joke?..

dude i said sorry u could use any name if u dont like the person.

i got a joke womens rights